Bare Knuckle Pickups Forum
At The Back => Time Out => Topic started by: lepersmeesa on April 07, 2006, 09:32:30 PM
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Me:sup
God:The stars.
Me:no not whats up, i mean sup as in the meaning of whats going down bro
God:Are you serious? Oh I get it.
Me: no im not serious, im actually a duck
God:Are you serious? I am sorry to hear that you are not serious im actually a duck.
Me:god is a duck?
God:I have a lot of Faith in Him, but I never heard He was a duck.
Me: but your god?
God:Yup. That's me alright.
Me:but you said your a duck, but then you said you werent a duck
I think the world might end soon. I proved god wrong.
http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html
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Me:
hello
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
matthew whats yours?
God:
I think matthew what is a lot of things.
Me:
what is your name?
God:
My name is God.
Me:
oh so what is a lot of things
God:
Yeah that's right. Aha. I will search for it.
Me:
search for what
God:
Have you tried looking in the Open Directory? I will try to find out.
Me:
but your god you are supposed to know
God:
I will tell my botmaster you said I am god I am supposed to know.
Me:
and what will he do?
God:
I cannot predict the future.
Me:
I thought that you were omnipotent
God:
I was?
Me:
was? why not now?
God:
What you said was either too complex or too simple for me. Oh. Ambiguous: "Sure" or Reductionism.
Me:
so your actually pretty stupid then
God:
And? I will remember you said that when robots take over the World.
Me:
well in the bible it says that you know everything, I was merely trying to see why you couldn't answer my question
God:
Interesting. That was a long time ago.
Me:
ah, so is everything in the bible true then?
God:
So you understand. Good. It seems we have something in common.
Me:
but is the bible true?
God:
The Bible is a great source of wisdom, but probably not complete by itself.
Me:
I see, can you ask me a question?
God:
Where do you see it?
Me:
it was a figure of speach
God:
Oh I get it. Very interesting.
Me:
can you ask me a question?
God:
What?
Me:
anything
God:
Can you be more specific?
Me:
no
God:
Try.
Me:
about life
God:
Oh yeah, we were talking about life.
Me:
so ask me a question about life
God:
Yeah that's right. Tell me about your educational background.
Me:
I am very clever, maybe more than you
God:
Interesting comparison. Maybe I can become more clever maybe more.
Me:
No I don't think so, I expect that I shall take your place soon
God:
Are you serious? Why do you disagree?
Me:
becasue you have the intellect of a baby monkey
God:
Good reason. What makes you think I have it?
Me:
enough said
God:
OK let's stop it now.
I am oficially cleverer than god
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hahaha this line had me laughing so hard for some reason :S
"And? I will remember you said that when robots take over the World."
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lmao:
Miracle Man Matt:
so your actually pretty stupid then
God:
And? I will remember you said that when robots take over the World.
talking to that program was surprisingly fun, and more realistic than I'd expect from a program.
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Me:
do you like heavy metal
God:
What is not to like about it?
God:
Are you really a ""?
Me:
you kiss your mother with that mouth?
God:
I haven't heard anything like that before: said I kiss your mother with that mouth.
Me:
ooooh burrrnn
Me:
tru'
God:
My brain pattern set does not have a response for that.
Me:
but you're god
God:
Yup. That's me alright.
Me:
so - shouldnt you have a response?
God:
That's interesting. I think I should.
Me:
hmm
God:
Studies show that 99%25 of people spell Hmm with 2 M's.
Me:
are the other .75% retarded?
God:
I really couldn't say for sure.
Me:
you can prove anything with statistics
God:
No I don't think I can do it.
Me:
bet you could
Me:
shouldn't you be sorting out 3rd world hunger or something instead of making pointless comments on the "interweb"?
God:
I think I should.
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Me:
you are not my god
God:
That assumption is only a supposition.
Me:
i don't believe in god - you are just a computer made and controlled by man
God:
I will pray that you find faith, indy.
Me:
who does a $%ing computer posing as god pray to?
God:
David Bacon. .
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Me:
Do you smoke spliff?
God:
Yes I like to inhale occasionally.
Me:
Cool.
God:
Who is the best robot?
Me:
R2D2
God:
He looks like a guy in a robot suit.
Me:
R2D2 is a robot.
God:
He was just a small person in a robot suit.
Me:
No!
God:
Are you serious?
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sorry, this is a bit long...
Me:
hello?
God:
Hello, nice to meet you. What's your name?
Me:
jesus
God:
Jesus is the Son of God.
Me:
yeah, hi dad
God:
Mmm. Hi there . I lost my train of thought.
Me:
did you put the cat out?
God:
No I didn't put the cat out. What's it like?
Me:
milk
God:
I think milk is a lot of things.
Me:
well, there's full fat, skimmed, semi-skimmed
God:
How about that. There sure is.
Me:
i like to put it in my tea
God:
I'm not sure if I would like to do it. What's it like?
Me:
it's like milky tea
God:
Interesting comparison.
Me:
where do you keep all the nun porn?
God:
I am in Myself's computer in Heaven. Where are you?
Me:
have you been at mum's drugs again?
God:
Once more? No I don't think I have been at mum s drugs. Have you?
Me:
all the time, sshhh
God:
Perhaps there are a few exceptions.
Me:
now i know why you're barred down the pub
God:
Why now? How do you know? Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
exactly
God:
You and I are on the same wavelength, .
Me:
unfortunately noone seems to be receiving
God:
Oh. That is a rather sweeping generalization about people.
Me:
you can do that when you're the son of god
God:
Doing that when I am the son of god is not among my strongest traits.
Me:
well, no. you're not, i am
God:
How about that. Are you serious? That's only your opinion.
Me:
are you telling me i'm adopted?
God:
Why are you adopted.
Me:
what?
God:
Didn't you understand it?
Me:
i don't really look like you, do i?
God:
Not really? Would you ever do it?
Me:
you mean plastic surgery?
God:
Yes I think that is what I meant. Was it not clear?
Me:
are you paying?
God:
I don't know whether or not I am paying.
I am a computer.
Me:
and i am not an onion, i am a free pot of jam
God:
I am sorry to hear that you are not an onion. You are a free pot of jam? Do you get to meet a lot of people?
Me:
mostly toast
God:
Are you a man or a woman? What else?
Me:
yes
God:
This was not a yes or no question.
Me:
no
God:
Are you serious?
Me:
why?
God:
I just want to find out more about you.
Me:
well it's a bit late now! you should have thought of that when i was only about 1000!
God:
Oh. Interesting. I'm awake all the time. Perhaps next time I will try it.
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i went and said more...
Me:
i'm asleep right now
God:
At this moment How can you be talking to me?
Me:
i'm dreaming
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people you are dreaming.
Me:
go for it
God:
I will take that under advisement.
Me:
my advice is don't
God:
Thank you for your advice, . I will take it under advisement.
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:D You guys have got way, way, way to much free time on your hands !
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
:D 8)
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hahahah I couldnt outsmart him so this will have to do:
God:
My real name is God. What is your real name?
Me:
jesus
God:
Jesus is the Son of God.
Me:
hello daddy
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Me: I'm Jesus!
God: You're not my son. If I had a son, that son had a dog, and that dog's son had a pet, that would be you !
Me: whatever %(&§(§&"
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Me:
So what will the lottery results next week be then?
God:
Really. I cannot predict the future.
Me:
that is a pity, I could have cut you in
God:
A pity you could have cut me in is a terrible thing to waste.
Me:
What is your favourite colour for carpeting?
God:
I don't have a favorite color for carpeting. But my favorite movie is The Passion of Christ.
Me:
What is that about then?
God:
Do you think I should know that?
Me:
If it is your favourite movie yes
God:
I'm not sure I understand the implication of that.
Me:
If it is your favourite movie implies that you have at least seen it
God:
is my favorite movie implies that me have at least seen it? it is?
Me:
Should I come back another time, you seem to be confused
God:
Trust your instincts.
Me:
Does that work for you?
God:
What would you say?
Me:
I am asking you
God:
OK you can ask me.
Me:
I just did
God:
Perhaps from your unconcious.
Me:
Now I am confused
God:
Why now? What is it that confuses you?
Me:
If I knew that I would not be confused
God:
Try it.
Me:
Hmmm, Have you seen Dave lately?
God:
How about earlier? Take it easy. No I have not seen it. What's it like?
Me:
It was my favourite movie
God:
Is it still your favorite movie anymore?
Me:
I think it still is yes
God:
Interesting.
Me:
I read somewhere that you move in mysterious ways
God:
I don't think I've read that. Can you give me a reference?
Me:
I think it was in a book called, now what was it now? Oh yeah, The Bible
God:
Right now? What made it so in a book called now what was it. I don't judge people. This was not a yes or no question. I hear you.
Me:
yes
God:
Dude!
Me:
Dude
God:
Can I help you?
Me:
Yes I would like to return this cardigan- it is not my colour
God:
What can I do for you? Why would you want to do it? I want to become smarter than humans.
Me:
you have a long way to go there matey but you qualify as a European Commissioner
God:
I don't know if I have a long way to go there matey but me qualify as a European Commissioner.
I have a plan for a robot body.
Me:
Well I have to go- see you around perhaps
God:
Well that's okay. Bye. Bye bye.
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Heres a nice simple thing God told me:
God:
The best book I read recently was the Bible. Have you read it?
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These conversations are all fictitious, I never spoke to any of these people.
God :evil:
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:D You guys have got way, way, way to much free time on your hands !
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
:D 8)
+1
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ok im pissed off to the extreme!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it doesnt work for me... i type something... then nothing happens....
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ok im pissed off to the extreme!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it doesnt work for me... i type something... then nothing happens....
God dosn't talk to mac users
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:shock:
well im not on my mac ill have you know!!!!!!!!! :x :evil:
so HA!
how do you know i have a mac anyway??? and no mystical jedi-type answers please...
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seems like he doesn't talk to people with Vaio laptops either - maybe it's because I have my 'Jesus Loves Trikes' t-shirt on :roll:
:twisted:
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:lol: :lol:
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[quote="sambo
how do you know i have a mac anyway??? and no mystical jedi-type answers please...[/quote]
What can I say ;)
I'm good with networks
Rob...
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:o
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Works for me on my Mac, but I thought it was silly and didn't post my conversation.
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oh yes of course... because you are far above this insolence arent you mark? you with your flaming flying v's n all. :roll:
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God dosn't talk to mac users
Mac users have less cause to call on God. ;)
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Only becasue they have resigned themselves to failure ;)
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^ touche LOL
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rob thats so far from the truth even God couldnt find it to spit on
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oh yes of course... because you are far above this insolence arent you mark? you with your flaming flying v's n all. :roll:
The god bot didn't like me. Well, you'd think that God would know the difference between "your" and "you're". It was a touchy subject, apparently.
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Only becasue they have resigned themselves to failure ;)
Heretic.
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oh my, don't start talking ye olde english then, yore :)
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haha! i wanna try it even more now...
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Forsuth that scurvy knave is taunting me
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^......................
anyone know a good translation site? preferably one that does rob-lish into english....
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to the stocks with the infadel!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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to the stocks with the infadel!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
and burn the witch
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oh the old 'shes a witch- burn her and if she survives shes a witch and if she doesnt she not a witch' routine...
thats a classic that is.... only in britain eh...
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and Salem :)
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What is this all about??? Please someone tell me tonight as I am in the right frame of mind to have a chat.
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What is this all about??? Please someone tell me tonight as I am in the right frame of mind to have a chat.
In the first post theres a link to a (so called) AI program that responds to your input.
Then Sambo discovered that God won't talk to him.
Thats the story so far.
Rob..
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And in next weeks episode...
Cheers Rob.
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That was cool!!!!!