vans for bands

[38thBeatle]

I was in a band once where we had a huge BMC truck. We were supposed to takes turns driving it but I never did.It was so big it could take all our gear and a sofa in the back for the passengers not able to sit in the cab to use. The Health & Safety police would go bananas these days. We slept in it( the coldest I have ever been!) and I reckon one or two may have pee'd in it-certainly some romantic 2 minute episodes occurred in it.

[AndyR]

^ Ah... the happy memories these tales are all bringing back to me :lol:

I was in a three-piece for years and we tended to travel in our private vehicles - a variety of estates and small vans. This was mainly gigging round South London.

When we did a long trip (eg down to the West Country for a few gigs) we would sometimes hire a van and squeeze "crew members" in-between the cabs and drum kit in the back.

"Crew members" meant people who were meant to be helping but actually regarded it as 4-5 day, 24 hour,  p1ss-up cum free holiday - so don't feel too much sympathy for the b@stards (we had to rescue some from the police, we had to repair our own kit from "roadie damage", etc).

But I do fondly remember our band "road song" - usually sung by the three of us in the front, when sat in traffic jams, lost on the way to a gig, etc:

"Bollox
Bollox
Bollox
Bollox
... (etc)"

Sung to the tune of "Amazing Grace" - anyone else remember that one? We can't be the only band/team that have thought that one up! :lol:

[Johnny Mac]

^ / ^^ Some great tales there!  :lol:

I've gone on the road with "Whole Lotta Led" a few times, but in a photographers capacity. Its a great laugh thinking up things to talk about on the motorways.

One was thinking of the most disgusting song titles ever. I can't repeat them though as they are way ott! We were going to pen some lyrics to them, hey it may even happen.  :lol:

[Tellboy]

Must have been grossly loaded over 15cwt!! One full Marshall stack, two 50w Marshall half stacks, 100w Marshall PA with two 4x12 columns, full Ludwig drumkit, 2 guitars,bass and 6 people. Only 3 speed gearbox - like permanently riding a roller coaster as it used to take for ever going up hills (in 1st or 2nd gear) but used to go like a rocket downhill with all that weight

Forgot to add to the list a very crude 'home made' lighting system which consisted of 2 boards covered in Par 38 coloured lights which were manually operated by the roadie.  The Par 38s didn't seem to last too long but we found a temporary solution after a gig in Torquay where we noticed that most of the seafront was illuminated by Par 38s  :D. After an hour of cramming as many lights as we could in the very limited space left in the van it looked like one of those kids ball pits  :lol:

[Dmoney]

^ / ^^ Some great tales there!  :lol:

I've gone on the road with "Whole Lotta Led" a few times, but in a photographers capacity. Its a great laugh thinking up things to talk about on the motorways.

One was thinking of the most disgusting song titles ever. I can't repeat them though as they are way ott! We were going to pen some lyrics to them, hey it may even happen.  :lol:

you used to talk on motorways? i remember driving round on tour out of london, getting somewhere by Vicenza in Italy and everyone being nude. food getting thrown at other road users, bottles of wee being thrown out of windows. Roman Candles being set off at other bands in vans and bottle rockets being fired from the passenger window. rocks being thrown into the car parks of car show rooms while you drive past in the dead of night!! riding on top of the van and jumping off into snow banks.

also whenever you stop to get diesel or whatever, every service station becomes a victim of petty crime.

best one was when we almost used a rental van to ram a car park barrier that had trapped us in Holland...!

[Johnny Mac]

^ / ^^ Some great tales there!  :lol:

I've gone on the road with "Whole Lotta Led" a few times, but in a photographers capacity. Its a great laugh thinking up things to talk about on the motorways.

One was thinking of the most disgusting song titles ever. I can't repeat them though as they are way ott! We were going to pen some lyrics to them, hey it may even happen.  :lol:

you used to talk on motorways? i remember driving round on tour out of london, getting somewhere by Vicenza in Italy and everyone being nude. food getting thrown at other road users, bottles of wee being thrown out of windows. Roman Candles being set off at other bands in vans and bottle rockets being fired from the passenger window. rocks being thrown into the car parks of car show rooms while you drive past in the dead of night!! riding on top of the van and jumping off into snow banks.

also whenever you stop to get diesel or whatever, every service station becomes a victim of petty crime.

best one was when we almost used a rental van to ram a car park barrier that had trapped us in Holland...!

We have ourselves a hellraiser!  :lol: I'm a bit long in the tooth for all that monkey business and mischief now but I used to get up to all sorts of mayhem in my 20's!  :lol: Keep it up and don't get caught in countrys like Spain as they're likely to batter you senseless with nightsticks ect, but that adds to the buzz of not getting caught!  :lol:

I like this guy!  :D

[PhilKing]

We loved it in Germany because when you would fill up with petrol you could get crates of beer too.  Since it all went on the same receipt, we got reimbursed for the beer as well!!

I remember coming back through customs one time with the sign from a Sex Shop on the side of the van (we nicked it in Germany and had got so used to seeing it that we forgot.  Customs had all of us out of the van and put the dogs in.  I think it smelt so bad after having been on the road 2 months that the dogs just wanted out and didn't smell anything.  The guys in the car that was being taken apart didn't look happy when we were let go with no other aggro!

[Dmoney]

hahah hellraiser.

last time we went away we went to the USA. i got some metal putty and a screwdriver free with a 5 fingered discount so i could fix the straplock buttons on my guitar. i also got some reading glasses and a beany hat for 'free' from a pound store as well as various snacks. I stole a machete from a venue we played at and a small plastic skeleton of what was meant to be a 7 year old. that got attached to our van, then placed under the wheels of somebody elses car. apart from petty theft, people were opening fridges in gas stations and stabbing bottles of pop with pocket knives so the contents would spray out all inside the fridge. oh yeah, and bending every chocolate bar, squeezing every doughnut. it was STUPID.

we got corned by 6 cops in colorado after doing all of the above, plus destroying the toilets in this place. the check out guy said we had stolen hats and he'd seen one of our friends walk out with the hat on. he hadnt actually stolen the hat that night, it was stolen from a gas station 2 nights earlier! hahaha. but what he didnt know was that other people had stolen the SAME hat from that store that night! the cops where gonna search the van, find 2 stolen hats, plus 4 english dudes and an Austrian with no work permits (illegal tour! haha). After we kept on arguing, the cops decided viewing the CCTV footage would be a good idea and the guy they were questioning who was with us agreed... but yeah, he still didnt know people had actually stolen stuff, plus there was probably footage of people stabbing fizzy pop bottles and stealing snacks. so we all pooped ourselves! at THAT point, another american who was with us, got a photo out with himself, the check out guy, AND the dude in the hat that he took when they FIRST went in the shop! the cops questioned the check out dude about it and he said our boy didnt have the hat in the photo, but agreed they took the picture when they first entered. only he messed up, cos our man DID have the hat in the photo! the cops decided he was mistaken, he was confused, they let us go!!!

CLOSE SHAVE!

[Johnny Mac]

^ Hmmm,  :lol: things tend to get out of control when your in a group of mentalists with the testosterone and adrenalin coursing through your veins! Then it all goes too far, you were very lucky! You could have been butt raped in a jail full of sex starved physcopaths!  : :P

[Dmoney]

its all a bit silly.
to be honest, we usually just sleep.

[bucketshred]

I've got friends who used to be in Raging Speedhorn. Some of their stories are ridiculous.