we had zero warning we were about to start though, thats the thing.
That's you exonerated then, apologies! :)
I can sort of understand him being a bit pissed off that he's turned up (what he thinks is) 15 minutes early and you've already started. He handled it very badly, obviously, but perhaps he just panicked a bit because it was an "instant decision" situation? (He still should've let you know about not turning up to the soundcheck)
Anyway, what happened happened, it can't be changed, but it needn't happen again. We're all going "yeah, don't take any shitee, kick the $%&#er out!" but it doesn't have to be all aggressive like that. You said you're friends - sit down calmly, face to face, and talk it out (maybe you already have).
well, this is partly where my sadness about the situation comes. we've been playing together for 8 years, and we've become good friends in that time. i know hes not as passionate about the project as me, but i think thats the case in many bands, hes pretty dedicated thats definitely for sure, but not 100%, 80% maybe.. after all the tours, and adventures, i thought he'd have more class.
i agree with ratrod he might do it again, its a worry. but i hope to avoid some sort of aggressive stand off. when hes on form he has great stage presence and the crowd love him. hes impossible to replace that for sure, if it comes to that i'd rather go on without a drummer, or do something completely different with the project.
i don't know if you guys know too much about the 8bit scene, but together we've written a couple of real classics the audiences we play actually know and know well. its the fulfillment of a dream for me, even if the scene is quite small.
so yeah, its hit me pretty hard this whole incident. we have a rehearsal tomorrow, so lets see what happens.