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Author Topic: Never confuse laxatives with Viagra...  (Read 12603 times)

MrBump

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Re: Never confuse laxatives with Viagra...
« Reply #30 on: June 24, 2011, 06:34:31 AM »
Two nuns in the bath.

One asks the other "where's the soap?".

The other says "yes it does, doesn't it?".
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plastercaster

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Re: Never confuse laxatives with Viagra...
« Reply #31 on: June 25, 2011, 10:41:39 PM »
Two nuns are driving through a forest at midnight when a vampire leaps in front of the car.
The first nun says "show him your cross!"
so the second leans out the window and shouts "OI, You Arsehole get out the road!"
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CmdChicken

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Re: Never confuse laxatives with Viagra...
« Reply #32 on: June 26, 2011, 05:16:31 PM »
What's blue and $%&#s grannies?







Me in my lucky blue suit.
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JacksonRR

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Re: Never confuse laxatives with Viagra...
« Reply #33 on: June 26, 2011, 10:31:16 PM »
Hahahaha. Blue suit. Very nice. Sort of a twist on the what has two thumbs and knocked up your wife one.

FELINEGUITARS

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Re: Never confuse laxatives with Viagra...
« Reply #34 on: June 27, 2011, 12:52:46 AM »
Was she a Russian prostitute called, KNICKERSONOROFF.

I knew that one as Onya Bakyerbitch
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FELINEGUITARS

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Re: Never confuse laxatives with Viagra...
« Reply #35 on: June 27, 2011, 12:54:13 AM »
Self deleted - maybe crossing the line of decency - even for this thread

Can be found here though (NSFW or for the faint hearted)

http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/7rxyh/collection_of_totally_offensive_jokes_not_for_the/
« Last Edit: June 27, 2011, 02:00:21 AM by FELINEGUITARS »
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Shag101

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Re: Never confuse laxatives with Viagra...
« Reply #36 on: June 27, 2011, 01:19:36 AM »
Got this in my spam the other day..

A man and his wife go to their honeymoon hotel for their 25th anniversary. As the couple reflected on that magical evening 25 years ago, the wife asked the husband, "When you first saw my naked body in front of you, what went through your mind?"  The husband replied, "All I wanted to do was to f**k your brains out, and suck your tits dry."  Then, as the wife undressed, she asked, "What are you thinking now?"  He replied, "It looks as if I did a pretty good job."

As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman."  She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?"  A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!”
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CmdChicken

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Re: Never confuse laxatives with Viagra...
« Reply #37 on: June 27, 2011, 12:27:23 PM »
Hahahaha. Blue suit. Very nice. Sort of a twist on the what has two thumbs and knocked up your wife one.

I think the original answer is 'Pneumonia'.


How many babies does it take to paint a wall?



Depends how hard you throw them.
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choucas09

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Re: Never confuse laxatives with Viagra...
« Reply #38 on: June 28, 2011, 12:20:31 AM »
Why do black men wear baggy trousers? Cos their Knee grows.

ToneMonkey

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Re: Never confuse laxatives with Viagra...
« Reply #39 on: June 28, 2011, 08:18:21 PM »
Why do black men wear baggy trousers? Cos their Knee grows.

Get that out of one of those Nick Griffin Christmas crackers?
Advice worth what you just paid for it.

choucas09

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Re: Never confuse laxatives with Viagra...
« Reply #40 on: June 28, 2011, 10:23:36 PM »
It's word play not racism, how d'you judge baby throwing.

Dmoney

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Re: Never confuse laxatives with Viagra...
« Reply #41 on: June 28, 2011, 10:50:58 PM »
hear about the ice cream man found in the back of his van... dead... covered raspberry sauce, sherbet, flakes and 100's & 1000's?


topped himself.

Oroficus

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Re: Never confuse laxatives with Viagra...
« Reply #42 on: June 28, 2011, 11:15:39 PM »
When Rome burned Emperor Nero fiddled on the harp.
Nowadays in Rome the Pope just fiddles on the kiddies.

Dmoney

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Re: Never confuse laxatives with Viagra...
« Reply #43 on: June 28, 2011, 11:19:51 PM »
what do you get when you cross a kangaroo with a sheep?
a wooly jumper

Oroficus

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Re: Never confuse laxatives with Viagra...
« Reply #44 on: June 28, 2011, 11:26:35 PM »
What do you call a bloke with a rabbit stuck up his arse ?   Warren.