Artist's Revenge
A musician who's spent his entire life trying to get a record deal is
feeling extremely depressed. He's been turned down by every record company
he's ever contacted. No one seems to recognize his unique genius. So, he
decides to top himself and comes up with an ingenious plan to get back at
all the record companies who've rejected him all of his life. He books time
at a recording studio, and instructs the sound engineer to record everything
he says, and every sound he hears, and then copy it all onto 1000 CDs, and
send a CD to every record company executive on the list that he hands the
engineer. The guy walks into the vocal booth; the red light is on, and he
begins...
"This is a message for all you sycophantic, talentless, stupid record
company jerks who've ignored me for all these years. I've dedicated my life
to writing beautiful, emotive, soul-searching music, and all you bar-stewards do
is discard my tapes, never return my 'phone calls, and sign these horrible,
no-talent, ridiculous, dumb bands, and these filthy, dirty rappers! Well,
you bunch of morons, you parasites, you dumb pricks; I've taken all I can of
your puerile, shallow industry, and it's you who have driven me to this!
Good-bye you murderers of art!"
With that, he pulls out a gun, puts it to his head and blows his brains out.
The sound engineer glances up and says, "Okay, that's fine. I've got a good
level. Wanna go for a take?" :P
