That's on a high level, definitely, very tight and rhythmically demanding.
If I was to change something it would be add more dynamics, means if there's a break, try to change mood, switch to clean and pick some arpeggios or anything, so that after the next break the heavy riff will punch even more again.
It's this kind of frequent change of sound and mood that I love about SOAD. Not that you have to copy them but I find dynamics (dynamism?) is the most important thing besides harmonies and rhythm.